There are certain mind games psychopathic people play on purpose in an effort to manipulate and torment their victims. Learn what they’re, in accordance with an authority – and easy methods to beat them.
(*4*)Weaponizing what they perceive are your insecurities.
Psychopaths and malignant narcissists love attempting to provoke jealousy in you, manufacturing love triangles – some may even orchestrate break-ups to maintain you off-kilter and under their control. After love bombing you into investing in them, they deliberately try to impress you using what they think are your insecurities into keeping you depending on them, believing that you’re going to chase them as soon as they detach from you. Of course, this doesn’t work in the event that they have no idea what your real insecurities are, and their try and unsettle you finally ends up looking desperate and silly. If you observed you might be coping with a psychopathic person, it’s necessary to desert the notion you could ever be vulnerable with a toxic person and leave red herrings as an alternative. Never feed them the reality about your real vulnerabilities or fears. One solution to do that is to feed them a bit of particularly juicy misinformation to maintain yourself protected. For example, share a fake insecurity or small fear (i.e. “I am not a fan of your friend, Diana – do you think you’re spending too much time with her?” or “I’ve always been told my legs are too thin”). In reality, you could have no such thoughts about Diana and feel quite confident in your body. Watch how quickly the narcissist or psychopath gossips about your fear to a different person or tries to trigger that very same insecurity by going out of their solution to provoke you with it (i.e. suddenly they’re posting pictures of Diana on social media, or making snarky comments about your legs, simply to get an increase out of you, not realizing you faked those insecurities to see how they’d use that information). Now you’ve gotten confirmation this is just not a protected person and might detach early on at the primary sight of this red flag — and as a bonus, you could even get a superb laugh out of seeing how low this toxic person can go simply to get your attention.
(*4*)The “One-upping” Sore Loser Game
When empathic people express that they’re blissful for you, they honestly mean it. They’re celebrating your success or personal growth and luxuriate in seeing you win. When a psychopath or narcissist tells this lie, it’s within the interest of preserving their ego. While they might initially pretend to be blissful on your success, they’re already plotting easy methods to sabotage you because of malicious envy. To put this into context, recognize that narcissistic and psychopathic individuals are often stalking their former victims whether in real life or online even long after the connection has ended. Let’s say they learn that their former victim is engaged to a healthy partner, has moved forward and could be very blissful. As a result, the narcissist or psychopath will suddenly propose to their very own current partner in an try and “one-up” that former victim – not because they really need to get married but they need to win. These are the categories who will even place their very own wedding date near the date of their former victim’s wedding simply to take the highlight off them and try and deflate their former victim’s joy. To avoid being vulnerable to such mind games, keep private information private from a lurking psychopath or narcissist. If you observed you’re coping with someone toxic, avoid sharing your success, joys, or achievements in places they might access such information— no less than until they’re already well established. For example, don’t give the date of necessary interviews, celebrations, or presentations unless you wish this toxic person to try to impress you the day before. Wait until a major event in your life is over before you share pictures or news of your accomplishments or goals (or give a fake date or deadline if needed). This will prevent covert attempts at sabotage.
(*4*)The Withhold and Punish Game
Narcissists and psychopaths enjoy biting the hands that feed them – chomping down on them as cannibals, if we were to take the analogy further. The more kindness and generosity you show them, the crueler they will get in response because kindness to a narcissist is just seen as an invite to erode more of your boundaries. That is why they are going to punish you with silent treatments and withhold attention and affection after an extended period of affection bombing and of you investing in them. They want you to beg for them. They need to be the puppeteers, those on top of things. If they see you standing up for yourself, irrespective of how politely, or taking time to deal with yourself, what do they do? They take away one among your perceived “privileges” – the “right” to talk to them, the “right” to receive attention or any sense of security as they struggle to pit you against one other romantic prospect. No matter how irrational and recklessly harmful such an motion will be, they don’t care – even when such actions only harm them ultimately. For example, taking away “privileges” from the unsuitable person may end up in disaster if the narcissist or psychopath depends upon that person for some type of resource or labor that only that specific person can provide effectively. If within the presence of a toxic person playing this punishment and withholding game, recognize that the one “privilege” here is access to you – a form, empathic one that was even willing to take a position in them in the primary place. Use any silent treatments as time and space so that you can detach from them and deal with your individual personal goals. Keep taking good care of yourself and prioritizing yourself over the narcissist’s attempts to disorient you.
(*4*)The Dread Game
The dread game is definitely a typical mind game utilized in pick-up artist communities, and narcissists use it on a regular basis in relationships. They will orchestrate break-ups or ask for breaks out of seemingly nowhere to make you’re feeling unsafe and unsure in the connection and to try to impress your fear of losing them. By doing this, they expect their victims to proceed to bend over backwards attempting to chase them and regain their validation and approval – nonetheless, this definitely doesn’t work on all victims, especially not unpredictable ones who’ve tapped into their power. This often occurs when things are going well in the connection or during times if you find yourself attempting to set healthy boundaries with them. To reinforce their “authority,” and as a control tactic, they are going to feign pulling away and pretend that in case you don’t like their horrendous behavior you might be free to depart at any time slightly than putting within the actual effort to deal with your concerns. This takes the responsibility off of them and onto you. The burden falls to you to take care of the connection slightly than them taking accountability for improving. To prevent such a mind game from working on you, it’s necessary to cultivate independence in all facets of your life before dating anyone. Work toward constructing financial and emotional security so that you never must fear losing out on anything or anyone. Do not fear abandonment by a toxic person greater than you fear self-abandonment within the pursuit of that toxic person.
