According to psychologist and relationship coach, Dr. Antonio Borrello, probably the most common lies that men tell women are lies of omission.
For instance, your boyfriend might let you know about an excellent restaurant where he’s having lunch but leaves out the part where he’s there because he’s on a date with one other woman.
A person might lie concerning the way he feels to win you over. Sometimes he’ll lie to make himself look higher.
Indeed, these lies are manipulative and hurtful, but they can be easy to spot in case you know the signs.
However, it’s not each time you hear these words that a person is lying.
The point of this text is that most of the time men say this stuff, they’re either exaggerating, omitting, or outrightly lying about it.
That said, listed below are 4 subtle lies from different videos Dr. Antonio has posted on the subject.
1. The “I’ve never felt like this about anyone before” lie
This is something a man will often say firstly of a relationship, often before the couple could have sex.
It is a person’s attempt to come to you in a short time, often through the first date, and tries his best to charm you by telling you things that each woman wants to hear.
He tells you things like “I’ve never met anyone like you.” Or, “Where have you been all my life? If I had met you a few years back, we would be married by now.”
If you’re in your first date, or still firstly of your relationship when the person doesn’t know you yet and a person he’s already telling you things like this, he’s more than likely lying.
As Dr. Antonio put it,
If he really cares about you, there shouldn’t be any rush of compliments about things he’s unsure of yet.
If he’s not in a rush to get something from you, he should at the least wait to know you first before saying “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to him.”
2. The “I’m going through a divorce” lie
As Antonio explained, sometimes you meet a person of your dreams and he seems to be the whole lot you could possibly ever want in an individual.
And luckily for you, he feels the identical way too. He texts you, calls you, and invites you out on dates.
However, the one problem is that he’s married and has children. But he reassures you that he doesn’t love his wife anymore and that he’s within the technique of getting a divorce.
As Anthonio put it, (*4*)
Why is he telling you this?
Well, he likes you and is attracted to you. Quite right. But he wants you to be his mistress. If you fall for his lie, he’ll promise you that in the future, he’ll divorce his wife.
But until then, he’ll see you every time he can escape from his wife.
Don’t get caught up on this drama. According to Dr. Antonio, most often where this scenario plays out, his wife and youngsters do not know that you just exist, and divorce has never been a subject for conversation.
And the hard truth is, most times a divorce won’t occur. You’ll find yourself squandering precious years of your life being his mistress.
As Antonio advised, if he continues to chase you, you’ll have to set a vital boundary. If he wants you, he should first get divorced and live as a single man. Then you possibly can consider talking to him.
[Also Read: 5 Terrible Mistakes Men Make When a Woman Pulls Away]
3. The “I’m too busy” lie
Imagine the next scenario as narrated by Dr. Antonio
You begin dating a person who could be very career-oriented and successful. His schedule is relatively filled with essential things like work, colleagues, traveling, friends, etc.
He is so busy, but he’s making time to text you and spend time with you.
He is planning wonderful dates and making you a priority. It seems flattering because he’s such an excellent catch and he seems to be making out time to spend with you.
The first few weeks of dating go thoroughly and you are feeling like he’s genuinely involved in you, and also you’re really into him.
Just when he knows you’re now into him, he suddenly becomes a master of excuses. Now he’ll make plans with you and cancel them on the last minute with excuses like “I had to work late.”
He stops planning and commitments towards you as he did before. Instead, he’ll call you at night on the last minute and ask to come over to see you.
And because you realize he is actually busy, you agree.
Here’s the thing: If you proceed to allow this to occur, it would eventually grow to be the norm and he’ll get used to making neither you nor the connection a priority.
What do you do about this?
As Dr. Antonio advised, you will have to set some boundaries with him and choose not to be available to him on the drop of a hat.
Become more scarce and only see him if he’s making an effort to develop the connection by investing his effort and time into you.
You can’t allow him to call you late at night only for sex. He must be making an effort to spend quality time with you.
The next time he tries to call at night to see you, you will have to be strong enough to decline his offer.
Give another that requires him to put money into the connection. For instance, when he calls asking you to come over because he misses you, you possibly can tell him something like “I miss you too.
Can we meet this weekend? Let’s have some quality time where we will play a game, eat together, and have some fun.”
When you do that, you’re setting your standard and also you’re telling him to meet them. And if he cares about you, he’ll step up and meet your standards.
[Interesting: When He Lies About Everything: 9 Reasons & What to do About It]
4. The “I’ve been cheated on before” lie
According to Dr. Antonio, this can be a common lie or manipulation that controlling people use to justify and excuse their jealous behavior.
In his words, “They do it because they want you to feel sorry about the fact that they were cheated on and use that as justification for why they are so possessive and jealous.”
In other words, the person wants you to rationalize his possessive and insecure behavior.
He understands that if he gives the excuse of being cheated on before, you won’t see his behavior as a display of insecurity.
Instead, you’ll think to yourself, “I understand why he’s so jealous.
And you’ll fall into the trap of trying to prove to him that you just’re trustworthy, considering that in time, he’ll learn to trust you and stop acting jealous on a regular basis.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that anytime a person complains about being cheated on before, it’s a lie.
However, almost everyone has been cheated on in some unspecified time in the future, and there are higher ways in which work higher to handle the emotion than acting overprotective and insecure.
As Dr. Antonio concluded, “If he keeps acting insecure even when you’ve given him no reason to, he’s probably using past heartbreaks to cover up his insecurity.”
Final Words
Now that you just’re aware of those 4 lies, you should utilize this information to know if the person in your life has been manipulating you for his own advantage, or if he’s really a high-quality man with good intentions.
Every woman wants a loving, healthy, and delightful relationship.
If the person you’re dating uses these lies and excuses with you and also you’re anxious that he’s only using you to string along until something higher comes, then it’s time to call him out on it.
Remember you will have to let go of bad relationships to give space for good ones.
