The bare minimum man is the kind of guy who doesn’t exhibit outwardly “bad” behavior that calls for a breakup equivalent to cheating. But he also doesn’t treat you in a way that makes you are feeling necessarily loved or cared for.
Because the bare minimum man doesn’t initiate, he responds. He shows up but never on time. He hears you but doesn’t take heed to what you’re saying. He apologizes, but only if you ask him to. He’s romantic occasionally but just when it advantages him indirectly.
When you are attempting and ask the bare minimum man for more, trust that he all the time has a proof:
“Work is crazy busy, sorry. It will slow down eventually, promise.”
“I got really hurt by my sophomore year of college girlfriend seven years ago and need time to learn to trust again before I fully open up to you.”
Usually, his excuses will rely upon the concept of sooner or later because “one day” absolves him of any responsibility in the current. He blames situational aspects which might be seemingly out of his control so that you don’t blame him for his lack of investment and never the very fact he’s simply unwilling to place in the trouble obligatory to maintain the connection going.
Of course, this leaves maintaining the connection all on you until he’s “ready.” And you understand what? That’s bullshit. You deserve greater than that.
You deserve someone who’s all in. You deserve someone who’s capable of meet you in your level. You need to be with someone who you may grow with. You deserve someone who’s pleased with you and proud to be with you. You deserve someone who inspires you, who nurtures you, who looks at you as a partner. You deserve someone who plans dates and experiences, who works through disagreements with tenderness and with the shared goal of resolution.
You don’t deserve those things sooner or later. You deserve them without delay.
Because the difficult truth is that this: A person who starts off providing you with the bare minimum won’t ever change. You will spend your whole life begging for the fundamentals and it is going to be exhausting.
So please, let go of the bare minimum man. And if he asks you to remain (which he probably will) trust your decision. Stand your ground. After all, why did it take losing you for him to appreciate what he had?
You deserve someone who saw your value all along.
