Fate bringing two people together is a pleasant thought, nevertheless it’s not the reality. At least, I don’t need to imagine that it’s. I need to imagine that we’re the rationale why our relationship has lasted so long. That your ridiculous puns are the rationale why I laugh even when I need to cry, and that my every day “I love yous” are the rationale why you hug me so tightly and kiss me so tenderly.
I’m not going to present the universe credit for our labor. That was all us. The compromises we made after major fights, the within jokes we created after becoming best friends, and the choice we made to commit after realizing we desired to be together perpetually. It wasn’t fate. It was labor and determination and—most of all—love.
I don’t know, possibly it was destiny that caused us to fulfill. That you and I crossed paths in a world overflowing with other people to pursue. But our relationship would never have lasted this long without our full and complete commitment. So even when it was fate that brought us together, it wasn’t fate that made us stay together. That was us.
Some people say that the thought of soul mates is romantic, that it’s reassuring to know there’s someone on the market built for loving them, but I don’t see it. Isn’t free will, finding someone that you simply resolve to take care of and love and trust, higher than being karmically forced to this point someone? Isn’t our love story the more romantic one, since it’s what we wish versus what the universe thinks is best for us?
Say what you would like, but we’re accountable for our lives. That shouldn’t be a terrifying thought. We shouldn’t want destiny to manage our relationships so we will sit back, calm down, and blame the fates each time something goes flawed with our love lives. It’s time to begin taking responsibility when things go south and begin patting ourselves on the back when things go right.
I don’t imagine that we’re meant to remain together perpetually, due to the best way the celebs aligned or because some godly creature commanded it. But I do think we will last a lifetime if we proceed to like one another the best way we have now been, without judgment or restraint. That’s what is going to keep our relationships strong. Not fate.
Us.
