In his book, The Art of Seduction, Robert Greene identified a serious flaw in how most men (and ladies) see the other sex. He said,
To get a girl to concentrate to you, you’ll be able to’t rely on instincts or your hormones. They’ll only make you act in ways only men think. This is why some men will do some ridiculous things like sending d!ck pics to a woman they simply met because they think it is going to turn her on. That’s one-sided considering.
Men and ladies think in another way. Sometimes the difference could be so big in certain areas that the things you think that will attract a girl can push her away. But you’ll be able to avoid this bias by understanding these basic items that almost all men do fallacious with women.
1. Clinginess
Picture this:
A man who just had an important date with a wonderful lady. But because he got too enthusiastic about how the date went, he starts texting her immediately after the date. He then goes on to text her throughout the night after which the next morning.
All of which seem sweet up to now.
But soon, the girl starts feeling a bit suffocated. She starts taking some time to answer to his text. But as an alternative of him getting the message and cooling off a bit. He picks up his phone and calls her to ask her if he did something fallacious.
Sensing the girl is a bit withdrawn, he panics and starts apologizing, even when he didn’t do anything fallacious.
Some men fall into this pattern in other ways either because they’re insecure or because they simply lack self-control.
Sure, it’s great to remain in contact with someone you want, but you furthermore mght must reveal that you could have a lifetime of your personal. Clingy persons are off-putting because they’re emotionally immature.
We all want someone who has something meaningful occurring that we generally is a a part of. Sitting by your phone and anxiously waiting for a text to return demonstrates low value.
2. Oneitis
Some men think that a “No” from a woman is solely an invite to try harder. They turn out to be hyper-fixated. The more she rejects them, the more they strengthen their resolve.
It becomes about their ego. They stop seeing every other opportunity for excellent relationships around them. They only want that one woman who has made it clear that she doesn’t want anything to do with them.
Sometimes, the issue with these forms of men is their ego. They take a rejection as a private attack.
Other times it’s simply because they usually are not used to having it easy with a girl. They’re gotten used to chasing and fighting for attention because they keep ignoring the opportunities they’ve with the women who truly want them.
Whatever the cause could also be, oneitis can frustrate a person and make him mentally and emotionally drained. It’s not a spot you should be in.
Learn to see the signs. Romantic interest normally isn’t that complicated. If she likes you, you’ll know. Even if she doesn’t provide you with a “Yes” instantly, she won’t disrespect and disrespect you. She’ll provide you with her attention.
More importantly, you’ll see the signs in her body language and the way in which she looks and talks to you.
3. Chasing
Some men don’t understand that there’s a difference between chasing a girl and showing interest.
Showing interest simply means making her know you’re fascinated with her. Chasing, alternatively, means refusing to just accept that she isn’t interested.
Sometimes chasing is brought on by ego. These are men who take rejection as an indication that they’re not adequate. So they feel in the event that they can win her over, they’ll prove to the girl and themselves that they’re worthy.
Other times, men just chase because they don’t know what they deserve.
Think about it. If you understand what you bring to the table, it doesn’t make any sense to exhaustively chase one lady who has made it clear that she doesn’t want you.
It means you’re in search of her to finish you in a roundabout way. And women aren’t fascinated with completing you. The majority of the time, they simply want to return and share your experience with you.
You’re higher off with someone who wants you as much as you wish them. Relationships are difficult on their very own even with the precise person. Now imagine forcing someone up to now you after an extended exhausting chase. You’ve already created the fallacious dynamic before the connection even starts.
4. Assuming her value
We often make assumptions about people based on our initial impressions of them. This is why some guys turn out to be tongue-tied once they meet a gorgeous-looking lady.
In reality, she’s just one other human with flaws like every other person. But the guy has painted one other image of her in his head. Now he sees her as an excellent and places her on a pedestal without even knowing her.
We don’t just do that with the other sex. We do it with anyone who has the outside that you could possibly easily read perfection to. This is why they are saying “Never meet your heroes.” People are rarely what they appear on the skin.
The easy reality is that we’re all humans, with flaws and insecurities.
When you see a wonderful lady and also you treat her with none apprehension or anxiety, like every normal lady you come across, she notices it because she is used to getting special attention.
5. Going in too strong sexually
Some men think being a “bad boy” or an alpha male means talking dirty to a woman immediately after meeting her. They feel in the event that they quickly show that they’re bad, she’ll want them. So they quickly start talking dirty. Some even send d!ck pics after a primary date.
But this approach rarely works. And most times it’s outrightly annoying and immature.
Going in too strong sexually doesn’t make you a foul boy. It makes you seem needy. Alpha males don’t go around attempting to persuade women that they’re “bad boys.” They’re alpha males due to their character. Women respect them because they’re not needy or attempting to prove anything to anyone.
Rather, they’re comfortable with who they’re. They’re not pushovers or performers for ladies.
When you go in too strong sexually, you insinuate a level of immaturity. Every mature person knows it’s normally an emotional connection first. If you pursue sex, you frequently find yourself not getting it.
Final words
It goes without saying that these mistakes aren’t common only to men. And most of us are going to make them early on before we come up with ourselves as we grow old.
Some people still continuously make these mistakes. And the main reason is that they keep depending on hormones, emotions, and instincts to cope with the other sex. But this approach only results in immature and clingy behaviors.
As much as you should quickly have someone for yourself if you like them, you should even be rational about it.
