Toxic men rarely start a relationship being toxic. If they did, no woman would date them.
Like most men in relationships, they begin nice and charming. They’ll use their niceness to attract you in. But as the connection gets older, their true nature begins to surface.
But the issue often is that some women get stuck up to now. Even when the person has develop into obviously toxic, they will’t get past the nice old days when he treated them right.
They hold on to their idea of what they think the person must be. This is why some women sometimes decide to stay in toxic relationships.
That said, even essentially the most rational people get confused and blinded in moments of intense emotion. Hence, it helps to grasp the signs to look out for to know whether or not a person is toxic.
1. The blame-shifter
Nothing is ever the fault of the blame shifter. He’ll make you’re feeling unheard and depressed.
Whenever you bring up something about him that you just don’t like, as an alternative of him listening, he’ll bring a counter fault of his own. He’s quick to shift the blame to you each time there’s an issue in the connection. And he doesn’t mind the way it makes you’re feeling.
One option to recognize a toxic relationship, in response to the psychologist, Dr. Dianne Grande, is that your partner never shows regret or remorse when their actions upset you. They move on on the speed of sunshine and never look back.
This is a big red flag because there’s no love without empathy. If you truly love someone, then their feelings should mean something to you. They won’t put all the issues on you.
2. Gaslighting
You’ll confront him about something fallacious he did, but he’ll pretend prefer it never happened.
A gaslighter could make you doubt reality — and query your sanity. For instance, you could confront him concerning the proven fact that you saw a text that exposes he’s cheating. He’ll let you know you didn’t know what you saw. Then the following morning he’ll bring you breakfast with a smile like nothing fallacious is happening.
Gaslighters will deliberately alter the reality or refuse to acknowledge it because they only care about themselves. They don’t care what they are saying simply to get away with a fallacious act.
If you’ve a partner that’s at all times dismissing the reality and making you’re feeling like you possibly can’t trust your sense of judgment anymore, you could be coping with a gaslighter.
Also read: Why Girls Like Bad Boys, According to Psychologists
3. Hyperreactive to disagreement
He doesn’t need to hear any contrary views when in an argument because his stand is tied to his ego.
He feels he can’t be fallacious, and because of this, he never listens. It’s his world against yours each time you’re trying to unravel a disagreement between the 2 of you. And he doesn’t mind resorting to abusive words simply to win.
If you and your man cannot have a civilized conversation each time you need to say something that he doesn’t agree with, that’s an enormous red flag.
No relationship can go far if each parties cannot sit and have a civilized conversation after they’re not on the identical page. There are going to be times when conversations will likely be heated up. But it’s in these intense moments that you just catch up with and understand one another higher.
If you possibly can’t hear one another each time you disagree, then resentment goes to accumulate and crash the connection.
4. He makes you’re feeling insecure on purpose
He’s at all times bringing up his ex. And each time she comes up, it’s either guilty her for a way she caused the disintegration of their relationship or to hype her so you possibly can be jealous and compete against her for his attention.
Here’s the thing: Whenever your man keeps bringing up one other lady — ex or not — he’s not doing it by mistake. If it’s a frequent thing, he knows what he’s doing. He’s raising pangs of jealousy in you.
Some men just discuss their ex on a regular basis because they’re not over them yet. Whatever their reasons could also be, it’s still a toxic behavior. And it’s best to have a conversation about it before it takes a toll on you emotionally.
Some men have this toxic belief that they must make a lady feel insecure sometimes to bring her down from her pedestal.
For instance, they might call their girlfriend fat out of nowhere or tell her that what she’s wearing is just not good-looking. Sometimes they’ll compare her with a prettier woman in her presence.
Any man intentionally making you insecure is toxic.
5. Passive-aggressive jealousy
There’s nothing fallacious with jealousy. In fact, some people see it as an indication that somebody loves them.
However, passive-aggressive jealousy is what happens when a person is ashamed of — or tries to suppress — his jealousy. Everyone gets jealous. But insecure people treat their jealousy in a different way.
For instance, if a person starts being aggressive towards you just because you laughed on the joke of a cute male friend, that’s toxic. Deep down, passive-aggressive jealousy is rooted in insecurity.
Instead of admitting his jealousy and talking about it, he’ll punish you for it by either ignoring you or being aggressive to you. It’s his insecurity putting him off balance.
A high-value man is secure. Petty things won’t make him jealous. And even when a situation is serious enough to make him jealous, he has enough self-awareness to grasp what’s happening to him. He won’t lose control of himself and punish you out of jealousy.
Also read: 10 Ways A Virgo Man Will Test You (And What To Do)
6. The control freaks
Control freaks are cute until they develop into an excessive amount of.
The control freak is the sort of guy that can buy a selected dress for you on a second date and demand you wear it. Of course, that is cute, and never every guy who buys a dress for you is a control freak.
However, a control freak will keep cutting deeper and deeper into your boundaries. And the more you give him power over you, the more he’ll need to take from you. Soon, that cuteness in his need to regulate the whole lot will likely be like a jail to you.
He’ll need to see that you just wear only the things that he agrees to. And each time you do something against what he wants, he’s going to take offense.
Control freaks make you’re feeling caged. He will want to know where you’re on a regular basis. Before you already know it, you’ll feel like your freedom has been taken away. You’ll end up an increasing number of afraid of what he thinks. And some women may fall into the trap of wanting to please him on a regular basis.
7. Hot and cold for no reason
You must at all times be in your toes with him since you don’t know which a part of him you’ll get. Today he’ll draw you in and make you’re feeling loved. Tomorrow he’s distant, making you’re feeling such as you don’t even matter to him.
This type of cold and hot treatment can take an emotional toll on anyone. Not knowing which a part of him they’ll get, some women resort to over-pleasing the person. They hope that they will bring out the caring a part of him in order that they can get some cramps of affection.
But this sort of relationship isn’t peaceful. It’s riddled with anxiety and it is going to take a toll in your mental health if you happen to don’t leave.
Final words
The hardest a part of spotting a toxic relationship is just accepting that the one that was once amazing can develop into toxic. Some people get stuck in a toxic relationship just because they’re not seeing reality; they’re stuck up to now.
If you’re still unsure about the way you should be treated in a relationship, let this text be a reality check. Anyone who incessantly does a cluster of three or more of those seven things is toxic.
Related: Why Girls Like Bad Boys, According to Psychologists
