First dates are exciting, but they can also be a bit nerve-wracking. While you’re trying to make a great impression, it’s also important to stay alert for potential red flags that could indicate the person may not be a good match or may have concerning behaviors. Here are some red flags to watch out for on a first date:
1. Disrespectful Behavior
If your date is rude to waitstaff, dismissive of others, or shows any signs of disrespect, it’s a major red flag. How they treat others is a good indicator of how they might treat you in the future.
2. Excessive Talking About Exes
While it’s normal for past relationships to come up, if your date spends a lot of time talking about their ex—whether in a negative or overly nostalgic way—it could be a sign that they’re not over their past relationship. This might indicate emotional baggage that could affect any potential relationship with you.
3. Inconsistent Stories
If your date’s stories don’t add up or if they keep changing details, it could be a sign that they’re not being entirely honest. Honesty is key to any healthy relationship, so this is definitely something to take note of.
4. Pushes Boundaries
Whether it’s physical, emotional, or conversational, if your date pushes boundaries or makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s a serious red flag. A respectful partner will honor your boundaries and won’t pressure you into anything you’re not comfortable with.
5. Negative Attitude
Pay attention to how your date talks about life in general. If they’re constantly complaining, pessimistic, or have a negative outlook, it could be draining to be around them long-term. A first date should be about getting to know each other in a positive light, and constant negativity can be a major turn-off.
6. Overly Controlling or Possessive
If your date shows signs of possessiveness or tries to control the situation—such as ordering for you without asking or deciding everything without your input—it might indicate controlling behavior. Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect and equality, not control.
7. Excessive Flattery
While compliments are nice, be cautious if your date is laying it on too thick. Excessive flattery, especially if it feels insincere or is used to manipulate, can be a red flag. It could be a sign of love-bombing, where someone tries to overwhelm you with affection early on to gain control later.
8. Avoids Personal Questions
If your date is vague about their life, avoids answering personal questions, or seems secretive, it might be a sign they’re hiding something. While everyone deserves privacy, openness is important in building trust.
9. Distracted or Disinterested
A lack of engagement, like constantly checking their phone or not paying attention to the conversation, shows disinterest. If someone isn’t fully present on a first date, it could indicate that they’re not genuinely interested in getting to know you.
10. Excessive Drinking
If your date drinks excessively or encourages you to drink more than you’re comfortable with, it’s a concerning sign. This could point to potential issues with alcohol or a disregard for your comfort and well-being.
Being aware of these red flags can help you make informed decisions about whether to pursue a relationship with someone. Remember, a first date is just the beginning, and it’s important to pay attention to how you feel during and after the date. Trust your instincts, and don’t ignore any red flags that come up.
