Barry was my friend all through college. I still laugh once I remember the primary time I met him on the door, he wouldn’t even meet my eyes.
For the primary few months, the conversation between us was passive, nevertheless it got higher as time passed.
During our first yr, Barry was unable to get a girlfriend because he was too shy to mutter any coherent words in front of a woman. Even once I tried to hook him up with a few of my pretty friends, it failed miserably.
The change in him got here as a surprise, one I still look back on even today. The third and fourth years of school saw Barry undergo a string of a few of the most beautiful ladies on our campus on the time.
He was still very shy, so I at all times sat in my room listening to his pretty visitor talk and laugh through the skinny partitions, wondering: How the hell is he doing this?
I do know many shy guys have an issue approaching and dating beautiful women. In the presence of those ladies, they suddenly get tongue-tied and forget how to think.
When I asked Barry how he did it, he said, “I can’t change being shy, so instead of feeling down about it, I used it to my advantage.”
Equipped with a few of the very best dating advice told to me by Barry —a chronic introvert and a shy guy—and a few research I actually have done by myself, I’m creating this guide for shy men.
The dating pool could be messy and competitive, even for probably the most talkative guys, so the shy ones will remain at a drawback in the event that they don’t level up and learn to get the girl. Let’s cut to the chase. Here’s how to date beautiful ladies as a shy guy.
Your status is all the things
The cliche “looking good is good business” has never been more true. For shy guys, looking good is nice business.
Extroverts have a way of announcing themselves and making their presence known to everyone within the room. They either talk, showcase, display funny mannerisms, have a loud laugh, or do anything to draw people’s attention.
As a shy guy in a room with extroverts, you’ll hardly be noticed for those who don’t stand out. You don’t have to shout, talk, or act out of character; let your presence speak for you.
According to a study by Kelton Research, women robotically consider a well-dressed man sexy and successful even when he’s not. These women confess that a well-organized outfit makes a person more physically attractive.
So for those who are reading this as a shy guy, that is your cue to change your wardrobe and spend money on more organized outfits. It is one major step to getting you noticed by the attractive ladies.
Also read: 4 Weird Things That Will Make A Girl Want You More
The right body language is powerful
If you might be too shy to speak to a fantastic lady, let your body do the talking. There are certain body languages that ladies find very attractive, and it really works without you needing to open your mouth.
Do you understand why it really works? Because women are higher at reading and picking up cues from facial expressions and body language than men. It means for those who use the right body language, you’ll have the ladies flocking to you very quickly.
One of the highest body languages I learned from Barry is the eyes. When used to convey emotions properly, women cannot resist it. You don’t have to say a word.
Maintain consistent eye contact while finding an ideal balance; you don’t want to stare at them for too long. When they catch you staring, maintain the gaze for 3 more seconds, then look away with a smile. Boom!
Also, have a powerful posture, unroll your shoulders, and keep that smile on in any respect times.
Self-confidence establishes you as high value
You don’t need to speak. If you might be confident enough, your presence can be noticed by everyone. Confidence exudes a certain aura by itself, one that you may’t see but is visible to everyone inside your radius.
If you wish to know the way to date beautiful ladies as a shy guy, take this seriously. Shy people will also be confident; when you understand that shyness is normal, you’ll be able to easily work something out.
When you might be in public, avoid a slouching posture. Women notice this stuff; trust me, it doesn’t speak well.
Have an influence pose if you’re amongst people. It could be done by sitting upright and in a way that occupies space, controlling your hand and body gestures, keeping your tone and pitch normal, and maintaining eye contact. It’s easier said than done, but with conscious effort and baby steps, you’ll perfect it very quickly.
Interesting: How to Date the Cutest Girls Around You
An aura of mystery is exiting
As a shy guy, the one major advantage you have got over the extroverts who showcase all the things is the air of secrecy around you.
Women are attracted to mysterious men for several reasons. They love the unpredictability around them, their quietness, and their laid-back personality; all the things a few mysterious man draws them in.
When you finally get the girl, it is simple to get comfortable and begin divulging. While this isn’t a nasty thing, you wish to be sure there continues to be an air of uncertainty and mystery around you.
I’ve been roommates with Barry for 3 years before I came upon he’s been to seven countries!
I do know so many individuals, including myself, who would have found a way to bring it into the conversation on the very first day. But mysterious individuals are different, which is why they’ve that edge, even to probably the most beautiful ladies.
Hang out on occasion
Barry and I complimented one another well, especially for the primary two years when he had no friends.
I used to be an extrovert, and I at all times took him to bars, hangouts, and even libraries, where I’ll introduce him to my friends and acquaintances. He made cool friends that way, which he would have been unable to do alone.
As a shy guy, you wish the outgoing crowd to complement your introverted nature. When you’re with them, you get more exposure in public, which might assist you to step up your game and find the attractive ladies.
Related: How To Make A Girl Chase You Without Talking (Psychology)
Plan activity dates
While you could be tempted to plan private romantic dates with that beauty you simply found, it may not be an excellent idea.
It’s a primary date, which implies you might be each just getting to know one another; any slight dilemma or discrepancy, you’ll likely never see the woman again.
As a shy guy, you might be already aware that you simply might face difficulty initiating and continuing conversation, so why not plan activity dates where talking isn’t the foremost source of entertainment?
You can go kayaking, bike riding, bowling, or other fun places. You may even go to an art museum where you’ll have a curator do the talking for you.
Hang out with other girls
Before you discover a woman you wish to be romantically linked with, it’s best to practice dating and communication skills along with your girlfriends.
When you hang around and spend time with a few of your platonic girlfriends, you get to pick up certain skills and recommendations on how to relate with women ideally. Girls think otherwise from guys, and you’ll be able to only learn this if you hang around with other girls.
You’re already an excellent listener
If you’d slightly not say anything, it’s best to channel your energy into being an incredible listener. According to science, women love great listeners, and for those who show her you might be one, she’s going to get much more attracted to you.
When a lady likes you, she wants to discuss all the things with you: her morning routine, what she ate for breakfast, her problems at work, and her overbearing boss. The moment she notices you aren’t paying her any attention or contributing to the conversation, she immediately withdraws.
One way to show you listen is by remembering the small details. The next time you meet, you’ll be able to coyly ask, “How was Mary at work today? Did she say anything about those papers you left on her desk?” Watch her eyes widen as she says, “Oh, you remembered!”
It indicates your interest, and also you didn’t even have to say or do much.
The key tip in keeping your shyness under control
In all the things you do while trying to date beautiful women, be sure you might be comfortable. The key tip to keeping your shyness under control is being comfortable.
Once you’re feeling thrown out of your comfort zone, panic sets in, and also you start to fidget or lose control. This spiral is instantly visible to any woman around you and is a complete turn-off.
Don’t feel insecure about your introversion or shyness. You may even make jokes about it. It shows how integrated and emotionally mature you might be as a person. A man who doesn’t mind being vulnerable is attractive.
Conclusion
The key takeaway here is to learn the way to make your presence known in other ways asides from talking. Once you master this, you’ll have no problem attracting the appropriate women.
Also, work to improve yourself as a person, this manner, you wouldn’t have to worry or stress about getting the girl. Beautiful ladies will naturally flock around guys who’ve things occurring for them, no matter whether he’s shy.
Related: How to Get A Girl to Kiss You Without Asking
