We all want our youngsters to have greater than we had growing up. And with access to social media they’ll see what other kids appear to have which continues to feed the cycle of wanting more to maintain up with their peers. But are we helping or hurting our youngsters by giving them greater than we had?
In Dr. Madeline Levine writes:
In spite of their economic and social benefits, .”
The Warning Signs…
Experts warn that overly-indulged children can develop a toxic combination of traits:
Entitlement – Believing they deserve special treatment simply for existing. ‘The rules don’t apply to me.’
Lack of Motivation and Purpose – With every need met, there’s no drive to attain independently. ‘Why should I work for it?’
Disconnect from Reality – Oblivious to the on a regular basis struggles of odd people. ‘It’s not my problem. They should just get a job.’
Inability to Cope – Having been shielded from adversity, minor setbacks feel catastrophic. ‘My life is ruined!’
Giving Up Easily- If they don’t experience success immediately, they quit.
Teens from affluent, well-educated families could seem to have all of it on the surface. But underneath there can exist profound unhappiness, anxiety, and substance abuse issues, encased within the bubble of privilege.
Raising Resilient, Grounded Teenagers
So how can parents avoid these dangers? Parenting researcher Dr. John Gottman emphasizes these key principles in the case of parenting teens:
Validate Emotions Over Achievements
‘You don’t need to be perfect to be loved.’ Praise character and dealing hard over appearance and results.
Instill a piece ethic by assigning chores and inspiring a summer job.
Help them discover a path to purpose-process with questions, stories of individuals living with purpose and begin fanning the sparks you see.
Build their emotional intelligence through Emotion Coaching, a key parenting activity. It is a predictor of success.
Learn easy methods to set limits with teens while giving them an area to explore and make decisions on their very own.
Aim for 8-9 hours an evening – this makes an enormous difference for growing brains
Help you teen navigate peer relationships.
Encourage Community Service
Expose them to other ways of life and different communities. Cultivate empathy and gratitude. Help them open themselves as much as those that are different from them.
Your attention and care mean greater than any material possession. The most vital resource is emotional and relational.
The paradox is that the privilege meant to present kids a head start in life can turn into anchors weighing them down. By keeping them grounded in core values like resilience, humility and compassion, parents can raise joyful, balanced youth.
Gottman’s research highlights that emotional coaching, attunement, nurturing and providing guidance are vital for all children, no matter socioeconomic status. Privilege devoid of those elements risks producing youth who’re emotionally adrift despite material abundance. Gottman’s parenting tools provide a blueprint for raising grounded, resilient individuals prepared for all times’s tests. Research also shows that relational and emotional wealth is all the time more precious for the kid than material wealth.