If you’re a young guy attempting to wrap your head around “how to handle your first date” or “how to attract women fast!” then you have to have come across them.
The self-anointed alpha male dating coaches with no credentials or licenses, exploiting the ignorance of young men, encouraging them to never be vulnerable with women.
Sure, there are some real and helpful dating coaches on the market, but the vast majority of these coaches who prefer to call themselves “alpha males” are allotting outrightly toxic advice.
Being an honest guy isn’t cool anymore
Do you call or text girls after a primary date? Then you’re a simp.
Have you ever told any woman you liked her? You’re a simp.
Do you usually open the door to your woman? You’re a mega simp.
For a toxic alpha male coach, a person should never show emotions. They consider beautiful women are all the time placed on a pedestal, and it’s the job of the “alpha male” to bring her down.
Anything you do within the direction of care, love, or commitment is seen as “simping”.
The alternative? Well, the toxic alpha male dating coach will inform you “Never pay her a compliment.” “Treat her like she doesn’t matter that much to you.”
They’ll often advise their followers to “Break her ego.” And they offer these varieties of advice with the idea that pretty women concentrate to guys who treat them in a different way.
However, there are some ways to face out as a man without having to be a “mean alpha male.”
People stand out through their strength of character.
If the lady you’re involved in doesn’t want you because she thinks you’re too decent for her, you shouldn’t change your values because you desire to change into the mean alpha male that each woman loves.
woman will appreciate a great man when she sees one.
Toxic alpha male dating coaches exploit the ignorance of young men
Most of the blokes watching these dating coaches are young. These young guys are desperate for somebody to only tell them what to do.
And most of them, with all of the frustration and anxiety they’ve had coping with women, openly grab anything anyone who has enough “alpha male act” will tell them.
Anyone can easily cook up stories about how they picked up ten girls in a single night with one bazaar alpha male strategy they usually’ll consider it. Why?
They are searching for a prescription. Going out to try things out for yourself is difficult. We are all the time trying to reduce chaos.
Hence, most young guys will moderately sit back and chill out with their YouTube videos and watch someone they consider knows all of it tell them what to do.
And dating coaches understand this. They know all they should do is sound convincing enough.
They get a great hairstyle, hire beautiful models, shoot videos and take pictures with them, showing their young and hungry followers that their strategies work.
[Related: 10 Reasons Why Dating Is So Hard For Guys]
They teach young men to never grow up
It takes emotional maturity to be vulnerable.
Building an excellent relationship with one person is gorgeous and likewise difficult.
When you were sixteen, you almost certainly had fantasies of getting a dozen big butt models chasing after you.
But if you grow up, you realize that there are much more essential things in life than having multiple women around you.
First of all, grown-ups have jobs. They have bills to pay. There’s barely enough time for themselves, let alone time for sexual escapades.
Hence, learning to construct something solid with one partner is what grown-ups do.
But the toxic alpha male coach thinks it’s a nasty idea to point out commitment. They’ll inform you a lady will value you less if she thinks she’s your priority.
Showing vulnerability is taken into account a giant simp move. Why?
“I’m an alpha male. I have to be tough, masculine, and dominant all the time. Showing vulnerability makes me weak.” This is the definition of a grown-up boy.
They make young men more insecure
The average alpha male dating coach will share his experience with women in just about all his videos.
He’ll go ahead to inform how he already began having sex with this hot girl just after ten minutes of talking to her.
Is the story true? Well, there’s no option to discover. So who cares?
Their unrealistic standards cause a lot pressure. They make young guys assume they should be out every night having sex with multiple women before they will feel like they are real men.
This mindset, in fact, only makes these guys more insecure of their abilities to interact with women.
They come to tie their masculinity and self-esteem to the form of response they get with women. The more rejection they get, the more insecure they change into.
The reality is that each girl cannot connect with you. Trying to interact with people to get something in return will only make you come off as unnatural and most probably result in rejection.
The best sorts of connections occur naturally. Take your mind off attempting to get something and learn to enjoy social settings. Learn to actually care about people. That’s the way you healthily attract women.
[Also Read: 10 Biggest Dating Mistakes Guys Make With Women]
Most alpha male coaches are just playing the part
The alpha male dating coach beating his chest and telling you to man up could also be living in mom’s basement.
He may even have it worse with women than you. You could also be more hardworking and more achieved than he’s. But you wouldn’t know that.
In reality, there’s so rather more to life that makes you a person than simply with the ability to get together with women.
Be an individual of integrity, who inspires others to be higher. Work hard and construct a life you’re happy with. Respect people. Be a force for good in society. Learn to rise up for what you think.
These varieties of things matter more and can make it easier to gain respect and admiration than playing mind games.
[Interesting: 4 Hard Truths About Chasing Women Most Men Don’t Know]
Red pill advice has change into toxic advice
Most toxic dating coaches are available in the disguise of bringing red pill advice to young men.
But the red pill simply means not being disillusioned anymore concerning the realities of the world. Telling young men that being vulnerable or showing emotions makes them weak isn’t a red pill, it’s a toxic pill.
If you’ve listened to a few of these coaches and you’re thinking that turning away from the decent person that you just are will bring the eye and respect of girls, have a rethink.
As the traditional German philosopher, Arthur Schopenhauer wrote in his Counsels and Maxims,
You’ll never have the ability to manage how others react to you, and also you shouldn’t attempt to.
Deciding to change into a mean person because you’re thinking that that’s what is going to bring the respect and a focus of girls will only frustrate you.
Besides, why must you be involved in a lady that desires you to be a “bad boy” before she likes you?
Find those that connect with you, who will appreciate who you are. Save yourself from unnecessary emotional turmoil.
Your masculinity isn’t measured by the number of girls you’ll be able to attract. Believe me, there are much more essential things to be done in our world.