May 16, 2024
Dating

I’m a Woman Living With HS. Here’s How I Navigate Dating and Relationships

My flares also may be triggered by what I’m eating on the time, and I have a couple of foods that may make my symptoms worse. So I need to take heed to that when I exit on a date. There’s this concern that if I say, “Oh no, I can’t eat this,” they are going to respond with, “Well, why?” Then you are feeling like you’ve to maintain making up excuses.

I am currently single. I love my independence and freedom but it could actually definitely take a toll on me at times. I’m like, “Is there anybody out there who can handle this?” But at the identical time, I feel like if a person really loves me and respects me, they’d be willing to embark on this journey with me.

I need to share my condition with a partner and be comfortable and myself in front of them. I used to do dating apps. It was a bit easier, provided that I could discuss my condition from behind a screen. If they didn’t prefer it or feel comfortable with it, we could just part ways, or I would just block them [laughs].

Now I hope to satisfy someone the “organic way” or in person. Recently—for the primary time in a very long time—I told a potential date, whom I met through a co-worker, about my HS before we went out. I normally never tell anyone until after I’ve made a connection but I desired to be straightforward about it. I showed him a few articles about HS, and as of now, I haven’t received a text back. I got stood up for the date that we had planned.

However, I know I’ll meet someone soon, and I know it is going to truthfully be well worth the wait. Because when I meet him, it’s going to be an experience and bond that I will treasure. I know I’m a good person, and I know my qualities nevertheless it’s like, dang, now I got to inform them about this.

My advice for individuals who need to discuss HS with a partner is to talk on it only when you feel comfortable. Do not ever let anyone take you out of your comfort zone. You will know when the time is true—all the time trust your gut.

You don’t need to do anything to “prove yourself” either. I’ve talked to many guys and I all the time thought that perhaps if I showed them that I’m a great person physically, mentally, and spiritually, they’d accept me for who I am. I used to all the time put other people first. At the top of the day, you might be all you’ve got—and nobody has you such as you do—so all the time put yourself first. The dating scene is hard generally, so be patient and kind to yourself. I comprehend it is difficult to have HS, but that doesn’t make you less of a person. Nobody is ideal; no person is best than anybody. Differences are what make us special and unique. Don’t ever let this condition stop you from living your best life while dating.

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